floating thoughts

in my head.

reminding me of the hurt and things i have been did wrong upon.

did he do it because he was already sick? did he do it because i didnt give him the attention he needed? well, nothing is valid reason for the things he did, but it is worth a second chance aint it?

i’m so tired of thinking, and i’m so tired of worrying. for now i know i can’t just walk away.

i want to become a better person for myself too and not anybody else.

Been a while

since i last blogged.

Maybe its a little too late to recap my 2014, it took the term “roller-coaster emotions” to a whole new level.

Going through snippets of the happenings, i cannot bring myself to come to terms with the betrayal i suffered, the sympathy i felt, and the love i have for the person i promised to live together and ever after. part of me float through reality to illusion, from illusion back to reality. everything seem so vivd, so intimate, i cannot seem to differentiate anymore. bring me back and teach me to co-exist – in 2015.